When I heard about a Milwaukee hospital that spoiled 500 doses of COVID vaccine, I knew which one it had to be. Absolutely knew. Why? I’ll tell you why. Below is a darkly comedic family story. Darkly comedic is my family’s specialty!

When my mom was dying of cancer she had a request: We needed to find the worst hospital in the area for when she was on her last breath. “I don’t want those sobs to try and save me and put me through pain. I want them to be so lousy at their jobs that they kill me off right away!”

We toured hospitals around Milwaukee by rotating where she got her weekly blood supplement. Every hospital was doing this work well. Our quest to find a lousy hospital was coming up short.

But then we found one that looked like a Marriott and was just 10 miles from my mom’s home. They failed at giving her the blood supplement twice before they finally did it right. The place looked like it was filled with incompetents. “Here! Take me here! Fill me with morphine and let me die happy!”

That’s what I did when her time came. And they were completely incompetent at this hospital just like we predicted. They ignored my mom’s health directive and tried to save her. But they had absolutely no talent to do that. They were breaking equipment. They gave up after 10 minutes. It was a comical horror show. “Just give her fucking morphine,“ I said. “That’s what she wants.”

Which hospital was it? The one in Grafton that spoiled 500 doses of COVID vaccine this week. Truth!