I’m cleaning up files that migrated to my new computer and found this ditty. Must have been recorded somewhere around 2009. Change the bridge and it could apply even more today.
Because NC passed its bathroom law, I get to see Audra McDonald and the SF Symphony tonight. The symphony was supposed to be in NC, but has instead chosen to celebrate LGBT pride in SF with a gala concert. Thank you, NC legislators, I guess. It’s the only time, though, that you’ll get thanks from me.
This will be somewhere around the seventh time I’ve seen Audra. I guess I’m semi-officially an Audra groupie. My wife says Audra might be the only person I’d leave her for. She might be right! I used to feel the same way about Alfred Brendel, but my wife never worried about him.
FWIW here are my Audra chronicles.
1994, Lincoln Center, Carousel, I walk out of the theater and go on and on about, “Who was that?”
2000, w/San Francisco Symphony, I walk out of the concert hall and go on and on about how wonderful she is.
2004, w/Boston Pops, I walk past a symphony hall on my way to a business meeting and I hear her booming voice. I had no idea she was in town. I say screw the meeting and hear her rehearse. Then I go to the box office. Do you have any tickets? I ask. One at a table, I’m told. I buy the ticket. I sit next to a Boston Brahmin. Twenty minutes into the outstanding show, the Brahmin leans over and whispers to me, “If she wasn’t black, she’d be as good as Garland.” I think he’s intentionally trying to get me to strangle him.
2004, a sort of Audra meet. I run into a marvelous singer. I ask where she’s from. Fresno, she says. Oh, Audra’s town, I say. She turns bright red. Don’t ever say that name to me, she says. Why not? I ask. I was in high school with her, she says. “Do you have any idea what it would be like to audition for parts and compete against her? For years, I thought I had no talent.” I express condolences, but think, well, she’s good, but she’s no Audra.
2005, Mountain View. My wife says there’s a benefit for a charity she likes. Audra is performing. Do I want to go? I scream for joy. She expresses her opinion that I just might leave her for Audra if given a chance. I think she might be right. The concert is actually mediocre, but hey no one is perfect.
2015, Broadway, Lady Day at Emerson’s Bar and Grill. I love those recordings of Billie Holiday when her voice is shot and she has one foot in the grave. Poignant stuff. So this is a special night for me. Audra doing Billie in decline. I’m in town on business. No way am I not going to see this. But I’m worried. This could be a train wreck. It is in fact jaw droppingly good. The audience, I can tell, knows nothing about Billie Holiday or Audra. They have no idea Audra is singing poorly on purpose.
And now, tonight!
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